Too Many Drinks
by The Atomic Cafe
Summary: Harry Potter and CSI:NY Remus and Tonks, on vacation in America, find themselves at a crime scene run by Mac and Stella.


**Too Many Drinks**

**By Dimgwrthien**

_Disclaimer: I do not own CSI:NY, Harry Potter, or affiliates of either._

"I try to take you to a fun place on vacation, and we're stuck in here," Tonks sighed. She crossed her arms and leaned into Remus, who put an arm around her. "We've seen enough murders. Damn. Muggles have to _interrogate_ us now."

Remus glanced back at the man in the middle of the hotel lobby. He had a deep wound through his chest, possibly from a gun, and blood still drizzled from him onto the polished floor.

A woman with massive brown curls and bright green eyes stood before them, holding a pad and pencil. "Detective Bonsera," she introduced, looking at them before opening the pad. "I need to know what you saw."

Remus opened his mouth to answer, but Tonks beat him to it. "We saw a man stagger in and drop dead. Can we please get back to our rooms?"

Stella raised an eyebrow at Tonks, who had managed to change her hair from pink to a short, red hairstyle before they entered New York. "Could you let the man speak, too?"

Remus shook his head as Tonks looked offended. "I saw the exact same thing. How much longer until we can get back upstairs?"

"In about an hour, I'm afraid." Stella finished writing something on her pad, then glanced at the two of them. "Thank you very much."

As Tonks and Remus walked away, Tonks muttered, "Tell me we're not suspects. I could think of five better ways to kill a -"

Remus tugged on Tonks' shoulder slightly. "Let's just get out of here. What do you want to do?"

"Go back into our room," Tonks answered sourly. When she saw Remus' face, she said, "Fine. Let's go somewhere with a ton of drinks. I hate seeing dead bodies on my day off."

Looking over to the man at the far side of the room, close to the door, Remus made a motion as if to say 'Let's ask him'. "Excuse me," he said. The man looked up, and Remus noticed that he wore a business suit and carried a silver case like the woman had. "Are there any good pubs around here?"

The man frowned for a second. "This is a crime scene, and you're asking about pubs?"

Tonks sighed. "Yes, we are. We're going to a pub if you're keeping the crime scene there, because we can't get into our room. It's damn annoying. The elevator is across the hall from the murder!"

"It's still considered part of the crime scene," the man said, raising his eyebrows. "Detective Taylor," he greeted, showing his badge. "Has Stella asked you for your eyewitness accounts?"

"The brown-haired woman?" Remus asked. "Yes."

"Can we just get out of here?" Tonks sighed. "Came for relaxation, and get a damned dead body."

Mac shook his head. "I'm sorry. We need to keep the witnesses inside the building. No one is the leave or enter, nor disrupt the crime scene."

Tonks raised her eyebrows, and Mac said, "It's possible, as long as the suspects don't try anything stupid. Most of them are used to crime scenes. I'm taking it you're not from New York."

"Did the accents help?" Tonks asked, tapping her foot lightly on the floor.

"Not at all," Mac answered. "You wouldn't believe the number of accents you hear here. Now, if you'll please excuse me…" He sidled along past them.

"Let's just look around the hotel," Remus offered. Tonks nodded. If she was going to spend time with him in New York, she'd still find a way to have fun. "I'll get you a drink from the bar."

Stella, meanwhile, finished taking pictures when Mac started examining the body closer, looking at their hands, the entrance wound, then rolling the body to see the exit wound.

"Went all the way. Bullet would be from… there, if the witnesses saw everything correctly." He motioned to the left side of the hall.

"Snarky woman, isn't she?" Stella asked, glancing over at where Tonks and Remus were leaving.

Mac ignored her. "I'll search for it. Should lead us to a gun."

"Damn witnesses are always horrible," Stella muttered.

Mac continued to ignore her. "Did you get a picture of the wounds under the vic's eyes? Look almost like a knife. Rather thick one, at that."

Stella said nothing. Mac glanced up at her, half-frowning. "Here, Stella. Concentrate for a few hours and I'll get you a drink later, alright?"

Stella shrugged, taking a picture of the wounds. "Going to Sullivan's, though," she told him, putting down the camera to look at the vic better. "I want beer because I'm having a miserable day."

Mac raised his eyebrows and gave her a small smile. "Alright. Let's just get the evidence back to the lab."

"And go let everyone out," Stella told him. "I'm pretty damn sure the killer found a way out by now. What are the chances of him blending into the crowd?"

"Not until we have the evidence."

In the bar, Tonks ordered two beers and handed one to Remus. They both drank in silence for a while. Remus finally put down his drink and stared at Tonks. "Look, we'll head back up to bed when they're done, alright?"

Tonks smiled at him, her grin becoming wider. Remus feared that her hair would start turning pink. "Alright," she answered, kicking his foot rather painfully under the table, then apologizing.

"I meant sleeping, but whatever you want to do. It was your choice to come here."

They finished their drinks, and Tonks was ready to go up for a second round when Mac entered the room. "Thank you, everyone, for staying here. You're all free to go."

Tonks dropped the order and left with Remus among the crowd.

Evening dropped quickly as Mac and Stella wrapped up the case. Once they had the bullet, the case became strangely easy. The killer, Stella later remarked, must have forgotten his brain at the door.

Keeping his promise, Mac brought Stella to Sullivan's, ordering a round of drink, then sitting with her at one of the tables. It was a bit crowded, people threading through the tables and talking, but Mac and Stella could easily handle it.

Remus and Tonks sat a table away, both swaying very slightly from their day, which involved three bar visits. "Damn Americans," Tonks slurred, taking a drink. "Too many crowds - so appealing."

Remus, completely unaware of what she had said, nodded, then finished his drink. "Verymuchso," he answered.

Tonks noticed the second group and watched them for a minute. "You're those two detectives," she said, her voice strangely high. She swallowed to try and lower it. "Find that murderer?"

Stella glanced at Mac, who answered, "Yes."

"Good," Tonks said, taking the last sip from her drink. "I like catching killers, because they're so funny when you put them in prison. It's like, no! Let me out! I hate this place! So you're saying no! Get used to it! And you put them in Azka-"

Remus kicked Tonks, not quite drunk enough to forget their cover.

"So you're police officers?" Mac asked, eyeing the two. Tonks nodded, waving her hand to flag down a waiter. When the man came, she ordered four drinks and let him go.

"I am! Now, him - I dunno what he is."

"I'm a teacher," Remus answered back, his sobriety returning very slowly.

"What department do you work for?" Stella asked Tonks.

"I work for the Ministry of -"

"We're from England. You may not have heard of the Ministry of…" Remus cleared his throat so that it sounded as though he wasn't trying to think of a name on the spot. "The Ministry of Law Enforcement. It's actually a vulgar name they give it, as it's not a real ministry within itself."

Tonks opened her mouth, but Remus kicked her lightly, causing her to whine.

When the waiter returned with the drinks, Tonks told him to give two to Stella and Mac. "They're my new friends," she told him, her voice melting together in small slurs. Remus made a note to stop letting her drink.

Stella raised her eyebrows. "I thought you hated us for keeping you at the crime scene."

Tonks smiled cheekily. "Nah. Just joking around." She moved her chair so that she could put an arm around Stella. "We're friends."

Stella smiled back, just a small smile. "How many bars did you go to?" she asked Remus.

"Three," he admitted.

Mac covered his mouth with one hand, trying to stop himself from smiling.

"What?" Stella snapped, and Tonks echoed, "Whut?"

Mac moved his hand back to the table. "Just a picture-worthy moment, you know? Stella, I've never seen you _touch_ a woman like that."

"You're drunk too, I assume?" Stella snapped.

Mac made a vague shrugging movement. "Maybe I am. I don't know."

"I'm driving," she answered.

"Have you realized that no one in the lab trusts you to drive?" Mac asked. "I don't care if I'm drunk; I'll drive."

Stella looked offended but said nothing. Tonks moved again to take another seat that was behind Mac. She draped her arms around both Remus and Mac.

"And two men!" she giggled. "Lucky, lucky. Susan -"

"Stella."

"Yeah, Stella. We're two lucky women." She kissed Remus on the cheek, then Mac. "I'm going right back to the hotel with them, and you're invited."

Remus pulled Tonks' arm from Mac's shoulder and his own, then stood up with her in his arms. "I'm sorry," he said, and sounded miserable. "I'm just going to get her into bed and let her deal with the _hangover she's going to have tomorrow_." The last few words were directed to Tonks in a mildly threatening voice. "Goodnight."

Mac and Stella waved their hands to them. Mac was still grinning.

"What?"

"You were tempted to take up the offer," Mac joked. When he saw Stella's look, he quickly said, "No, no. I'm just joking, Stella. Let's just hurry up and get to bed. There's more work tomorrow."

"You don't sleep anyway," Stella told him, taking his almost-empty mug of beer and putting it to the side. "Let's head back and make our own offer."

Mac felt just drunk enough to understand where she was coming from. "Alright," he said. They walked out of the pub, hand in hand.


End file.
